Funny things to say on online dating

All I ask for in terms of payment is that if one of my openers helps you land a girl, you think of me when you hook up with her but not, like, in a gay way or anything, be cool. Please use discretion when choosing your opener. What should we order for breakfast the morning after our date? You know what else is a Crimea? I just wish there was more I could do, ya know? Do you like making out? If not, I could seductively come up behind you and teach you.

I like being big spoon. What were we talking about? Also, checking out an adult film on my laptop and calling my friend derogatory names. One time I threw a football so hard, I almost dropped my whiskey, but I was able to catch it with my elephant trunk of a penis. Here are a few good examples:.

Exactly What To Say In A First Message

All you need are some magic words from the wizarding world. You can find more funny one-liners for Potterheads here. After matching on a dating app, Travis wrote the following first message: As a general rule, sexual language and references in a first message are no-nos. You could end up alienating your date before you can send a second message. The girl actually did respond with her phone number.

11 Online Dating First Message Examples That Get Responses

He claimed he was pulled over by a cop for texting and driving because he was writing a message on the OkCupid app. Clearly, this guy is a smooth talker.

TOP 60 Funniest Tinder Profiles On The Internet - Alonzo Lerone

And hey, some girls are into bad boys who live on the edge, risking life and limb for their lady loves. Dream3vil certainly makes an impression in his first message, and he even throws in a directive from a police officer to make it harder to refuse. You can get as imaginative as you want with it.


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Your first message should be indicative of your personality. Oliver loves putting pineapple on his pizza and joking around.

More From Thought Catalog

His approach to online dating is playful and helps him quickly find someone who gets him. Such stereotypes can stop someone from getting to know you on a dating site where superficial judgments are common — but you can also use them to your advantage. He also makes his intentions known, appealing to online daters with a rebellious side and a raunchy sense of humor.


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  • Funny Online Dating Messages: Make Her Laugh and Win Her Heart!

The whole message gets more and more ridiculous as it goes on, but the awkwardness seems intentional. What I also love about this message is he keeps it clean. Last of all, we have I Hedonist making a self-deprecating joke on OkCupid.

Unleash Your Creative Side

Oftentimes you can melt the hearts of jaded online daters with a clever quip or a quirky compliment. When she was growing up, her family teased her for being "boy crazy," but she preferred to think of herself as a budding dating expert.


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  7. As an English major in college, Amber honed her communication skills to write clearly, knowledgeably, and passionately about topics that interest her. Now with a background in writing, Amber brings her tireless wit and relatable experiences to DatingAdvice.