My main problem here is that - when we broke up she didn't take steps to remove me or block me from anything, she just limited her FB profile etc and we unfollowed each other. She would view my insta stories every now and then etc. When she texted me about this new guy however, she has since taken steps to remove me from everything and privatise her profiles. To answer your question on whether she has moved on, it would honestly depend on how early on in the 7 years of marriage she began to feel this way about you but usually for a relationship of 7 years, it is unlikely that she has completely moved on.
However, that does not mean she has not given up on the relationship a long time ago. Based on Kevin's email, just because someone may think of you or even miss you, does not mean that they will react positively towards you still because these thoughts of you may come in waves but their logical selves tell them not to act upon it.
Also, there's a good chance that this guy may be a rebound relationship after being together with you for so long, and if she is still on edge towards you, space would be a better option as opposed to pressure from your end, resulting in potentially accelerating the speed at which she moves on. Thanks for the reply. I couldn't pin point it myself when she might have begun to feel this way. We weren't without problems, but I didn't think they were huge issues that couldn't be resolved.
She was still talking about our future, joint bank accounts, what we'd do with our home and where we might move to etc just two weeks before the breakup, so to me all this doesn't indicate she gave up that long before When we went on our holiday I noticed a bit of distance from her, but when I questioned her she just insisted she was tired from the travelling etc so I didn't question further. She became protective of her phone, when I confronted her about it she said she had been talking to her siblings about some of our issues, I got the feeling she wasn't as over some of the things we fought about as she lead on.
We talked about it again and she again accepted and lead on that it was all well. When the breakup occurred she said she had wanted space and time to figure things out and learn to forgive fully, and said that she was still very much in love with me and that even though we were doing better, that it wasn't where it needed to be for her to think about spending the rest of her life with me so she wanted to figure that out.
This makes no sense to me because if things were better then I don't see how breaking up helps that along. It feels as though maybe she didn't want things to progress to get better due to mixed feelings from this other guy - if he was hovering around her, which seems more likely in hindsight. I feel like she used old issues as an excuse to bolster her reasoning for looking elsewhere, as there was zero warning for the break and she refused to talk about any of it as if scared of confrontation.
I will give her her space, not like I have much of a choice at this point lol. I've made an effort to block her on some social media accounts as it's easier for me not to look that way, but I've noticed she's made another account and has accidentally liked some of my things, would you chalk this up to just curiosity and nothing more? It's only normal for an ex to miss the other person after a breakup, her included.
Her actions were most probably the result of missing you, getting curious to see how you were doing and thus visiting your profile. However, it usually doesn't mean anything and it definitely isn't a case where she's looking to get back together or would take any further action. I doubt this is going to work for me.
I will shortly elaborate. We were together for 3 years, broke up for 5 months now. We had a phone call a few days ago where she said: I moved on, found someone new and I prefer to not have contact anymore. She would always respond and I've been improving my flaws, however it was all in vain.
Part 2: Doing No Contact When She is with Her New Boyfriend
Do you think there is anything else to do? We study together and I won't see her due to summer for another 3 months. Keep in mind that your changes aren't simply going to get her to jump back into your arms again, and neither is she going to miraculously develop passion for you again. You're going to have to make an attempt to win her back as if it were the first time you were trying to win someone's heart and treat it as a fresh start.
Perhaps at this point, it may not work out since she has told you this, but there's no telling what may happen after the summer break, but only if you're willing to wait it out. If not, it would be better to simply move on. Hi Ryan, So I just came out of a no contact phase with my ex who is seeing someone else.
I sent her a short letter about me apologising and briefly mentioning that I have changed my life around and that I would like to see her in person. Probably to continue giving her space for now, since she does not seem ready to meet you yet. You might also have to wait and see if the current person she's dating turns out to be a rebound or not before making your move in the future. I think i should start from the beginning.
Me age 33 and my gf age 29 were together for 3 years and she ended the relationship a month ago because i made her feel bad about herself and was toxic to her. Yes, we have been talking every day and at the start i was so confused that i paniced and did some stupid moves like begging and trying to talk her back etc.
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Now lets go back in time. First time was after a year we had been together and the reason was i didnt gave her attention and she hooked up with my friend and lied about that but we managed to get over it. Second time she left me was again after 1 year after we made up and i can say that same thing happened i didnt gave her attention once again , she hooked up with my friend again and then they both lied to me about that when i put the puzzle together.
Once again i was only thinking about myself and didnt notice her and didnt gave her my attention. I know, my mystake. You can see where im going with this. When we got back together i promised to her that im going to change, that ill be new person but i was kind of mad at her in my hart for cheating on me.
Is Your Ex In a Rebound Relationship? Find Out With These Telltale Signs
It was really hard because she lied to me. Time was passing and i did some changes - mainly changed myself to be more friendly with her kids she has 2 children and spending more time with her. I need to mention that we live different towns and i was the one how always visited her.
Mabye she just got bored? Now back yo present day. I dont know if i was still mad at her for cheating me but we had more and more fights. We had one fight every week and that exhausted us pretty bad. I could tell that she changed a bit later until she told me it was over. I can say that i was toxic to her. Now after she dumped me, she is immediately dating. Further more she has told me that she never can be with me again but as we have spoken i could see these little notes shes been telling. Like how she is not shure about loving again, or how she feels that she has failed as a woman.
For the last month after she broke up with me sha has noticed that i had changed, how i talk and what i do. She just keeps telling how sorry she was that i didnt change earlier and how she wishes that i had done all the changes before she left me. One thing ive noticed that after endind relationship she has actually never told me that she didnt love me any more or how she feels about me. Firstly, you have to keep in mind that no amount of justification makes her actions any more right than your lack of attention towards her. Cheating is something that would definitely take a toll on the relationship if you forgive her and get back together, because there's always going to be a sense of insecurity, self-doubt, trust issues, and resentment towards her for doing so.
- Part 3: Healing During No Contact When she is dating someone else.
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All these things translate into your actions which resulted in your toxic behavior. You should honestly consider the possibility of whether you were toxic for her, or if it was actually the other way around and her actions caused you to behave in a toxic manner. Lack of attention is common in a relationship, and it should have been addressed together as a couple instead of her getting bored and cheating on you on more than one occasion , and even lying to you about it after.
Hey Kevin, I been with my ex gf 4 years and 4 months its been great. We are living together for 2 years in college but after i graduated were in semi long distance relationship but I can visit her once a month vice versa. I admit that i begun too comfortable with the relationship not knowing that i did not give her much attention. Before we breakup she confessed to me that she likes someone it's her college crush. They dated 3 times before she told me.
Is Your Ex In a Rebound Relationship? Find Out With These Telltale Signs
I get upset and angry and i said something bad things to her and then she promised that she will never contact the guy and blocked him in all social media. She told me that she's confused about herself and to the relationship she told me she needed space so that she can fix herself but I keep blaming and threatened her to what she done I begged and pleaded that I will forgive her if she stays.
After 2 weeks she visited in our house we talked and there's a lot of drama she cried because of her guilt. I can sense that she's feeling guilty for what she done. So she decided to broke up with me because she's not ready to be in relationship for now because she knows she can't give her whole heart in the relationship because she like someone else. She told me that she needs time to fix herself and told me maybe someday we can start again so I agreed with her. I initiated NC but after 1 week I call her that I want her back but she's sorry because she doesn't know herself anymore and doesn't want me anymore.
I ask her if she's communicating to the other guy and she said yes. I get very angry to her to the point that i threatened and blackmailed her and promise her that i will make her life miserable if she will not stay with me. Then she promised she stays and never communicate with the other guy, but I know to myself that I will not be happy if she not happy. So I ask her forgiveness for the things I said and done. I begged and cried to her to start again but she said no.
So I just accepted the breakup and tell her she deserves to be happy.