So I did what anyone in love would do and took to google to try to understand how to communicate with her. I learned that her not looking me in the eye was not her being dishonest but it was part of her Aspergers and we did okay until one day we had a huge fight. She screamed and yelled and cursed at me, she ran to a room and closed the door and broke down on the other side. I stayed and sat on the other side reassuring her and trying to talk to her. She told me she was done with me she emotionally shut down and so I when on my way until we finally contacted each other and talked it out.
I let her know I didn't like to be yelled and cursed at and she agreed she didn't want to treat me that way anymore. Guys I had no idea of the struggle of meltdowns I thought she was just being immature every time this would happen I still would sit down with her and try my best to comfort her. We got back together the second time and it was a mess I was still up set about how she was treating me and had second thoughts if she was really committed to me and this relationship or not.
I could not understand why someone would not introduce me to her family and friends if she took this relationship seriously. We fought a lot and again we broke up. We broke up for a week. After getting back together we found out she was pregnant. I wanted to go to the doctor with her but she was having none of that and pushed me away.
It was not how she wanted me to be there for her. She told me we would have to terminate the pregnancy because it was going to be her life or the baby. I decided to trust her and to be there how she wanted me to be. She wanted nothing to do with me and pushed me away. She finally let me back in after she terminated and she still blamed me and believed I could not be there for her.
Dating Tips for Aspergers Women
So I gave her what money I could working as a barista and still going to school and I started to sell my plasma to make a little more money. Finally from September to December we have been stable I learned how to be there for her meltdowns. I'm caring and loving and I don't hold anything she says or does against her when she is going through one. I keep my emotions in check and remove myself from the room if she becomes to much and then we talk things out after. She talked to me about meeting her parents during the holidays we decided Thanksgiving was not a good time so maybe after.
She never brought it up again and I was hoping Christmas. Her father was coming to pick her up at her apartment that we have been sharing and told me I had to leave before he got there. I was rushed out the door. I wasn't to pleased and felt terrible we didn't talk very much after since she was going to stay with her parents for a while. She finally came to talk to me on the 23 of December and told me that she had been thinking about things a lot and she doesn't believe that on paper her parents will approve of me and I don't know when I'm graduating and I have no direction.
She doesn't want to get in a fight with her parents over me. It's going to be a while until I'm successful and she wants to be with someone on her level now. When I asked her what she wanted to do she said I diverse to be in a relationship that I want to have and she doesn't know what she wants. I have two DWI and I have been going to court for them over this last year. I'm a barista and a student working toward his degree. I'm 30 and I understand I have gotten a late start in life. I've really tried this year at school, turning my life into something I and the people around me can be proud of and I have tried so hard in this relationship and I'm doing all I can to learn how to love and communicate with her.
I know she thinks in black and white at first I would joke about my mistakes but after I learned how she thinks I try my best to come across as sorry and someone that wants to do the right things. She went though a manipulative and abusive relationship in college her parents made this guy a part of the family and when she told them things where wrong they didn't believe her.
Now they feel guilty and are very protective of her. She went to therapy after and was diagnosed with aspergers.
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I'm the only guy she has ever told only her parents and I know. I really love this girl.
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The many problems we have had I believe have been communication issues but now I'm scared my mistakes of my past have taken from me something that could have been special. I have no idea how to fix this one.
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Thank you guys, Hopelessromantic. Hopelessromantic87 , Dec 26, Welcome to Aspies Central. This is a friendly, supportive and helpful website. You can get a lot of good information here.
I'm an NT so will leave it to others to give you feedback on your issue. LucyPurrs , Dec 26, Since we have not met your girlfriend and don't know the specifics of her diagnosis, including co-morbid conditions , no one here can give you specific advice. But you may recognize some of her traits in the threads here that may, in turn, give you the insight that you seek. Two other resources if you are in the USA: Crossbreed , Dec 26, Not everything we do is because of ASD. I am 24 now, I only decided a couple of years ago to pursue acting seriously!
Foreword by Sarah Attwood. All I can think about is acting.
Why the Aspie Girl's Guide is written as it is written. Look at the other threads around here. But at some point early on I would have some chat that might go along the lines of "Listen Covering topics such as boyfriends, sex, pregnancy and rape, this book includes advice on building a support network, saying 'no', self-esteem and emotional healing and will prepare Aspie girls and women to make independent, informed and safe decisions when interacting with men.
I live in the UK.
I'm rambling on lol, so my question is: She is happily married to him, he makes my life Hell by teasing me incessantlyand although late in life, I am so delighted they found one another. You feel as though you are sitting having a heart-to-heart chat with your best friend. Even if actively avoiding romantic relationships or sexual encounters, a lack of understanding about acceptable social interaction between men and women can leave Aspies vulnerable to negative experiences.
He also shared with her that he is diabetic and wears an insulin pump. On their 2nd date, he told her he was an alcoholic. Debi doesn't use innuendo or assume knowledge on the part of the reader I don't think you'll have trouble getting a girl as long as you're confident. And I remember when that came out in conversation too early, I got red carded almost immediately. Making your choices and acting on them.
This beautifully written book should be essential reading for all young women, not just Aspies.