What to do if your boyfriend is dating someone else

Ask the other person if they were truly happy in the relationship. Be prepared for them to say they were though, in which case, asking them will backfire on you and you'll have to apologize and recognize that they were happy but explain that you're still not. Other points to consider: Avoid telling the other person that they drove you into the arms of another——that will only escalate into an unproductive discussion and says more about your inability to be independent-minded than it does about them.

It's not a tactic to escape unscathed; it's a way of telling your soon-to-be ex that you're making excuses. Make it clear that it's over. Acknowledge your own faults, lack of participation and inability to contribute fully to the relationship. The idea is to not apportion blame or to try to make your soon-to-be ex look bad; rather, help them to see that this is ultimately a good decision for the two of you.

Be on time for the meeting.

Show the other person respect by being prompt and exactly in the place where you agreed to meet, at the time you agreed. If you know that they're never prompt, take something along to do to pass the time so that you avoid getting frustrated waiting for them. Take a book, your eReader or play phone games. Just resolve to stay calm until they arrive and after, of course. Remain calm and in control throughout the discussion.

Keeping in control of a conversation means being ready to open it and to lead with the news of the break up as quickly as possible. Also be prepare to ask questions as much as or more even than you're asked questions, questions about how the other person is taking the news, how they're feeling and what they'll do next.

By making them respond to your questions, it shows that you care enough about their welfare to be interested but also deflects a focus off you all of the time, as they're forced to think over how they're taking it and how they're going to move on. All the same, anticipate the possibility that your significant other could flip out so keep that in mind during your break up delivery.

If you remain calm, perhaps you can tone down the situation. If they have items in your home, be sure to allow them plenty of space to retrieve their things without pressure or anxiety. You could even offer to have them delivered but don't sound like you don't want them to collect their own things if they want to. Keep an eye on the time. Don't allow the break up to last more than an hour. Have a good excuse ready such as meeting someone else, having to get work done or needing to get to bed early for an early meeting, etc. Offer to drop them back home if it helps or to shout them a taxi ride.

Try to end the meeting on a good note.

How to Break up With Your Significant Other when You Are Already Dating Someone Else

If the other person storms off, there is nothing you can do. However, if you can end it amicably, wish the other person well and you can even hug. It's also likely to shatter your confidence and self-esteem. But if you can successfully gain a fresh perspective on the situation that helps you rise above the negativity, you're likely to move forward more quickly toward better relationships in the future. Give up any hopes of getting back together with your ex. If you were spending time and energy waiting for your phone to ring, stop. Making a clean break with an ex and having no contact with him whatsoever will help your self-esteem recover faster, according to the University of Alberta Mental Health Center website.

Remind yourself of your ex's negative qualities.

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  • It's Not Necessarily About You.
  • Reasons and Excuses.

Don't focus on the good times you had together and what you admired about him. Instead, make a list of all the hurts, disappointments and irritations you suffered throughout your relationship. Share your feelings of anger and sadness with a trusted friend. You need to go through a grieving process. Verbalizing your sense of betrayal makes it easier to let it go and move forward.

It might be tempting to second-guess yourself about why you weren't aware that your ex was seeing someone else, or fall into the trap of believing you could have done something to prevent his behavior.

Identify Signs a Guy Has a Secret Girlfriend

I've blocked his number but almost have this need to see what he wants? Should I keep it blocked? Yes No I need help Keep it blocked.

In A Relationship But Falling In Love With Someone Else

He is living with another woman and you were his side dish for 3 years. That means that he has become extremely comfortable with cheating and if you do go back to him, he will just keep continuing his cheating ways. If he continues to contact you, you can send him a text stating that if he does not stop you will go after a no contact court order which would involve the woman he was living with.

Trust me he will stop then because he does not want to be forced out of that relationship or he would have left years ago when he met you. Yes No I need help I was just looking at your site cause I don't want to be a secret? I met a guy and he doesn't like to really talk about his past.

He hasn't even told anyone about us and he has moved out of state to be with me but just confused why he doesn't say he is with me to anyone.


Here he has no problem cause he doesn't know anyone. He even tells people that he is in a different state.. I know he tells people lies and was doing it to me as well but is working on that issue and he lies to his friends and family around me and the girls on his date site. I know he doesn't like talking about his past and wants to erase it and I do like him for him. I really don't know much about him. I know he is not with anyone else and claims his wife has passed. I am not sure really on details of his life and really can't get a straight answer cause he wants to put it in the past.

Heck, his mom doesn't even know where he really Is..

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  8. Reminding you we are in our 40s. I am lost on the situation..

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    5. meeting his parents before dating.
    6. I'd love to meet his kids but I know that will not happen except for the newest adult child he just found. I don't believe this.. I am a smart woman, however, I really like the way he makes me feel and don't want to lose that feeling.. It is so different than any of my other relationships..

      Help, My Boyfriend Is Dating Someone Else - Romance - Nairaland

      Yes No I need help The issues you are facing, all have massive red flags. Have you done an online search of his and his wife's name to see if there was at least an obituary for her? There are guys that say their wife has passed away to avoid the fact that they are cheating but in fact, their wife is maintaining their home in the other state, unaware that anything is even wrong because he told her he needs to work out of state for a while. He does not want to introduce you to his family, yet made the move to another state to be with you.

      He is hiding something big!

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      Perhaps he is with you shortly after his wife passed away and wants to give his children and mother time to grieve before he introduces you, but he could have just told you that. Now he wants to introduce you to a child that he did not raise and does not know much about his former life with his wife and children. Be wary of all of this and demand that he man up and introduce you to at least his mother or he needs to leave and the relationship is over.

      You are not young people worried about parental approval but established adults in your 40s! Yes No I need help How do I really know if he is single or married? I just had red flags comments and I'm floored. I am dating a man who is a lead security officer and seems to always be busy and only have time for me at night, never during the daytime, always says he is at work and can't answer his phone when I call him.

      Don't know what exactly you are asking here. I tried to trust him. Tried to listen to him not lying to me. I think it was caused by: I was too vulnerable Was this helpful? Yes No I need help If you are seeing red flags already then it is time to move on. He seems to not have time for you which means that either he has someone already or he is just not that into you. There are people who have highly demanding jobs yet still make what little time they have to spend with their significant other.